I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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