Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Randomize
