he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
