sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
