I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
