Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
