That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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