Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
