You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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