I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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