i don't like sucking hair
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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