i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
