I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize