We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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