She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
