i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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