belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize