Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
