Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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