what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize