Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
