I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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