We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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