I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
