kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
