If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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