it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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