is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
