So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I love you. Go after that dick
Randomize
