I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I touched a dick in church today
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
