Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
In America we eat man semen.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
