I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
