i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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