Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
