i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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