Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize