my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
