He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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