help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize