I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
