and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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