what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
