Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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