I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
