maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
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