Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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