How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
