Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
