He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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