you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
